Where It All Really Begins

My Own Childhood Traumas, Triggers & Healing

Growing up in China, my childhood was shaped by a culture where emotions, death, and even love were rarely talked about. My parents and grandparents were direct victims of the Cultural Revolution. Like many others, I was raised in silence — sent to my grandparents from the age of 1.5 to around 5, then returned to my parents shortly before they divorced. Altogether, I only lived with both parents for about five years. This is not an exception — most of my friends in China grew up like this.

It’s no surprise that so many people in their 30s and 40s are now experiencing anxiety, depression, or burnout. If you're in your 20s, 30s, 40s, or beyond and struggling with mental health, I want you to know this: it’s likely not about your job, your relationship, or your finances — it usually traces back to the years before we turned 10.

The body remembers what the mind forgets

Our brain is made of three major parts: the brainstem (responsible for survival), the limbic system (our emotional center), and the neocortex (logic and thinking). When we're triggered — by a voice, a tone, a sound, a rule, or even a facial expression — the reaction usually doesn’t come from logic, but from the deeper emotional brain. That's why 10 hours of talk therapy often doesn’t shift much. I’ve done 7 months of it myself.

Some of my deepest personal changes came through hypnosis. In one session, I went back to a moment when I was around 6 or 7, waiting for my father to come home. I couldn’t reach him. I crawled under the table, imagining he had died in an accident, crying on purpose so he’d feel guilty when he returned. That single moment planted a behavior pattern that stayed with me for years — trying to win love by suffering. I could have never reached that kind of clarity through thinking alone.

Another session revealed that my fear of being called weak or stupid came from years of criticism from my grandmother while I was still forming my sense of self. The sensitivity to loud voices that caused so many fights in my adult relationships? Also from childhood — from being raised in a home where dominant energy and pressure were the norm.

I also had a few sesions about my healthy boundary setting, perfectionism, and it all come back to memories before age 8.

Once these roots are revealed and felt through the body, the reaction no longer has the same grip. I was able to stay calm where I used to feel like breaking down. That’s what hypnosis can do when it’s done right — it doesn't overwrite you; it shows you what has been running in the background.

Change happens in every single session

Being a hypnotist, I listen to very heavy and painful trauma cases almost weekly — childhood abuse, rape, abandonment, death. Some people ask me if it’s too much, if I can keep distance. The truth is, I don’t feel the need to keep distance. During a hypnosis session, I want to be there 100%. There has never been a single case where I didn’t see a silver lining.

Our inner guidance and ability to heal is so strong. Sometimes our hearts need to break open again and again before they truly open. But once they do, there is a kind of love and presence that feels more real and lasting than anything else. I learnt to be gentle, careful and client-paced. And the more difficult a client’s story is before walking in, the deeper I often see the effect of the session. That fulfillment is beyond words.

Examples from real life

  • A client who was triggered by street noise traced it back to being physically punished by his father as a child.
  • A woman afraid of flying found the root in a time she felt trapped in a tiny flat.
  • Another client who wants to quit smoking remembered herself being bullied in the kindergarten and had to act strong.
  • One birth preparation client discovered her fear of hospitals came from a childhood accident, her fear of breastfeeding from unwanted tickling by relatives, and her fear of motherhood from internalized complaints from her own parents. After hypnosis, those fears faded.

If you're struggling, you're not broken

You’re not "too sensitive" or "overreacting." You’re likely carrying emotional wounds from a time when your only job was to survive. If no one showed you what safety, love, or trust looked like — how could you possibly give that to yourself now?

There is a way back

Hypnosis isn’t about forgetting the past. It’s about meeting it again, this time with understanding and support. You don’t have to carry it all alone anymore.

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